Letters To Mom: Leah’s Story.

This is my mother, Beverly. I love this woman with all my heart. My mother and I did not have the best relationship as I grew up. As a matter of fact, a lot of things I have had to heal from stems from her toxicity. I don't say that to throw any shade at my mother. What I realized in my healing journey is that my mother went through trauma herself. Some things she has spoken out loud and some things I know she will take to her grave; certain scars and traumas that will forever be unspoken and engraved in her heart. I wonder about that at times. This woman that is so accomplished and put together, what did her eyes witness? What did her ears hear? What has her heart felt? What has she had to process in order to make it through each day or even life as a whole? There's so many lessons this woman has taught me. My mom may not realize how much I observed every bit of what she would do. How she would move and speak. My mother moves with elegance and grace. She's a jazzy something. She taught us to speak like we have sense and to speak eloquently. She taught us to be classy and graceful; delicate but strong. She taught us to get nice/nasty when the situation called for it. Very recently, I had another long life talk with my mother in which I was able to truly forgive her for past things that I have happened. During the discussion, she opened her heart to me and I didn't see "mom" anymore. I saw a woman in all her beauty, in all her imperfections. This moment made me love my mother even more. She is human just like me. She's made mistakes, but I know she did her very best and I am forever grateful to the universe for her.